Homeschool
FAQ
What
about socialization?
Several
years ago, a friend of mine shared her wonderful answer about socialization
for the homeschooler -- she simply said, "Yes, we are concerned
about socialization, so we practice "selective socialization."
That has remained an inspirational answer when I begin to doubt
my efforts to carefully screen and limit my daughters' activities,
or when well-intentioned questions from outsiders begin to erode
my resolve.
As
they have grown older -- two in high school, and one junior high
-- we have amended our criteria a bit to include activities which
we felt unnecessary in younger years. The older child naturally
begins to desire more and more independence and activities outside
the home. So, based upon their own maturity and abilities, we have
sought out new situations for them such as serious youth groups,
driving themselves to friends' homes, structured excursions which
do not include parents, etc. We also attend many events WITH our
children (as chauffeurs, chaperones, organizers, etc.) which enable
our children to attend fun activities while our positions afford
us the abilities to influence and observe and disciple as necessary.
We
continue to encourage and expect interaction and fellowship within
the family, so that activities can always be shared among sisters
or other family members. The girls know that they do not need an
outside friend to enable them to go to the movies, to bicycle, to
shop, or go out to lunch.
We
have tried to impress upon the girls that a few good, close friends,
and a few wholesome, well-thought-out activities far outweigh many
flighty friends who do things solely because everyone else is doing
them. Focusing on what is pleasing to the Lord has been our compass
for seeking suitable entertainment for our family and daughters
as individuals.
Susan
Another
family also answers:
There
is plenty of biblical support for parents "protecting"
their children and selective socialization sounds consistent with
that biblical truth. It is the world that deceives parents into
believing their children should experience everything at the earliest
age and unsupervised. Of course, this type of dialog may be a turn-off
to many. So, let's talk about what socialization is. Socialization
is the ability to get along with people of all ages (old, young
and peers). Most children want nothing to do with children older
or younger than themselves. As children become teenagers, most want
nothing to do with adults or younger children. Yet, society would
have one believe that these children are being "socialized"
because they are learning how to get along with their peers. That
I suggest is not socialization, but anti-socialiazation. Rather,
the home school environment permits children and teenagers to learn
and practice true socialization by listening to adults (particularly
parents) and helping younger siblings. That is not to say all is
perfect, but it is better than having 20-30 kids in one classroom
all the same age. Most home schoolers are involved in outside activities
and have friends so that their is plenty of time for socialization
with peers. I would call this "balanced socialization."
For new home schoolers or those considering home schooling and hear
the myth that home schooling lacks socialization, I suggest you
look into the studies done on homeschooling that demonstrate (without
exception) that home schoolers on average, are above average when
it comes to socialization skills.
Karen & Don
Don't
they get bored staying home all the time?
I really
think boredom is a learned thing. I don't think it is the natural
state of childhood. Children are naturally curious and busy exploring.
Any time my boys say 'I'm Bored' my answer is that they are not
using their brains to think of something to do. Don't get me wrong.
There are times when all of us need some down time. That isn't boredom.
I think our society sometimes pushes children into so many activities
that they don't know how to structure their own time so when nothing
is planned they don't know what to do. Boredom expresses dissatisfaction.
At home with a less structured setting children learn to plan their
own time. They learn to get school work and house work and other
things that have to be done done. Then they can use their free time
for resting or playing, reading or gardening or whatever they want
to do. They aren't just spending a set number of hours here or there.
We have a lot of problems at our school that God is helping us through
but boredom isn't one of them.
Ginger
How
do you have enough patience?
How do you ever have time to do anything else with your kids there
all day?
Do you ever have any time just for you?
I've
only been homeschooling my three daughters 11,9,6 years since Nov.
1998, so I'm a real novice in the homeschool world. I am amazed
every day though at what I am learning-here are my answers to questions.
I've already come to see how homeschooling has given me more liberty
with my time-not less. Instead of having to plan my day around the
public school's hours, with three start up and release times, and
a heavy school volunteer schedule, we can now deal with each day
as the Lord sees fit to give it to us. If we have beautiful weather
in the A.M. we do yard and garden work (a wonderful science project)
and our school time comes in the afternoon. If Grandma needs assistance
picking up Great-Grand Dad we school in the morning and leave our
evenings free. We've discovered for our family that the time we
do school does not have to be set in concrete, so this allows us
more time to do other things. I work up our weekly lesson plans
and we make every effort to complete those lessons as the week progresses.
As
for patience I've only one real solution - PRAYER - lots of it!
I am
also blessed with a loving Husband, Mom and Sister who have given
me short breaks, so I can have time for myself.
Nancy
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